User:Woozle/annoy a liberal

From Issuepedia
A slight variation on the theme

There is a bumper sticker which is popular in US conservative circles and which says "ANNOY A LIBERAL - work hard and be happy".

I'm thinking that this is in need of countering. The following counters have occurred to me, but I am always open for more. I'm eventually thinking I'll take the best ones and set them up for sale on Cafepress or similar.

The beauty of this is that it doesn't really accuse anyone of anything; it merely names the sin, and dares you to condone it. Ideally, the first thing that should pop into the mind of any sincere non-liberal would be "Well I don't do that... do I?"

Good ones

  • be utterly wrong and never ever admit it
  • blow trillions of dollars on a pointless war and call yourself "conservative"
  • ignore or ridicule anyone not in a position of power
  • support the death penalty but say you're "pro-life"
  • support the war but say you're "pro-life"
  • invent rules just to control people and call them "morals"
  • start a war for "homeland security"
  • hate a gay person for Jesus

Need work

  • sheep variations:
    • be sheeplike and smug about it
    • be sheeplike and sanctimonious
    • be gullible and proud of it
    • unquestioningly obey authority
    • follow the leader
  • willfully ignore the man behind the curtain
  • fight sex education while being against abortion
  • fight to prevent same-sex marriage but say you're "pro-family"
  • insist that an honest citizen wouldn't fear being tortured
  • go around saying we need "another 9/11" to whip people back into line

Other Ideas

END CULTURE WAR
HUG A CONSERVATIVE TODAY!

(if you do it right, they explode)